Just look at him,
see what he's in?
Look at him jump,
over any big hump.
He's so happy,
without even taking a nappy.
That little sappy.
His head just goes round and round,
maybe he should be bound,
to a big strong tree,
that's what I think, yes, me.
He says he wants to cook,
as soon he's got the Nook's hook cook book,
for her a tasty meal,
so her heart he can steal.
He laughs, giggles, tickles,
and does strange things with pickles.
He stands on his hands,
listening to rockbands,
blood goes up his head,
maybe we should get him to bed.
To bed, to bed,
but it's occupied by Ned,
and of course his cow,
which I greet with a bow.
She too gives me a low bow,
it's a low cow bow.
He wants to run to her,
but it's way too far,
I'd say let's take the car,
but I just came back from the bar,
so I can't drive,
oh, what to contrive?
He wonders what to do,
to make her love him too,
Send a great big I love you card?
But then her dad might get him barred.
Give her many red roses,
from a shop called Smozes?
Ask the poets to help him write a lovely poem?
unfortunately, he doesn't know 'em.
There he sits,
looking for any word that fits,
maybe some song from The Nits,
they got lots of hits.
Moon, stars, stars, moon,
upon them he wishes he can meet her soon.
For she is a goddess,
no, really, not even without dress,
she's no less than a beautiful goddess.
And at night he starts roaming,
his mouth starts foaming,
and he's knowing,
into something else he's growing.
Then he runs in her dream,
but she doesn't need to scream.
He's a wolf, but don't distress,
cause he loves his mistress.
I shake my head,
but it was the cat in the hat, who said,
'He's mad, that brat. Go tell your dad.'
